Hi, ik ben Reind Dooyeweerd

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In your time, yes, but nowadays shut up! Besides, these are adult stemcells, harvested from perfectly healthy adults whom I killed for their stemcells. Well, then good news! It's a suppository. You'll have all the Slurm you can drink when you're partying with Slurms McKenzie!

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It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns.

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Bender?! You stole the atom. I suppose I could part with 'one' and still be feared… Oh, I don't have time for this. I have to go and buy a single piece of fruit with a coupon and then return it, making people wait behind me while I complain.

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I am the man with no name, Zapp Brannigan!

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In your time, yes, but nowadays shut up! Besides, these are adult stemcells, harvested from perfectly healthy adults whom I killed for their stemcells. Well, then good news! It’s a suppository. You’ll have all the Slurm you can drink when you’re partying with Slurms McKenzie! It’s just like the story of the grasshopper and the […]

Oh, all right, I am. But if anything happens to me, tell them I died robbing some old man.

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Large bet on myself in round one. Well, let’s just dump it in the sewer and say we delivered it. No! The cat shelter’s on to me. Leela, Bender, we’re going grave robbing. Yes, if you make it look like an electrical fire. When you do things right, people won’t be sure you’ve done anything […]

Can we have Bender Burgers again?

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Say what? Oh God, what have I done? I’m a thing. We’re also Santa Claus! Kif might! Moving along… Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar. Maybe I love you so much I love you no matter who you are pretending to be. Why, those are […]

Switzerland is small and neutral! We are more like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood!

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Oh Leela! You’re the only person I could turn to; you’re the only person who ever loved me. There, now he’s trapped in a book I wrote: a crummy world of plot holes and spelling errors! Ok, we’ll go deliver this crate like professionals, and then we’ll go ride the bumper cars. Who’s brave enough […]

And from now on you’re all named Bender Jr.

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Yeah. Give a little credit to our public schools. Morbo can’t understand his teleprompter because he forgot how you say that letter that’s shaped like a man wearing a hat. Now Fry, it’s been a few years since medical school, so remind me. Disemboweling in your species: fatal or non-fatal? Ummm…to eBay? Does anybody else […]

It must be wonderful.

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No! I want to live! There are still too many things I don’t own! Five hours? Aw, man! Couldn’t you just get me the death penalty? Stop it, stop it. It’s fine. I will ‘destroy’ you! It’s okay, Bender. I like cooking too. Why, those are the Grunka-Lunkas! They work here in the Slurm factory. There, […]

I just told you! You’ve killed me!

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Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused. You guys realize you live in a sewer, right? Oh, you’re a dollar naughtier than most. My fellow Earthicans, as I have explained […]

When will that be?

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I’ll get my kit! No! The kind with looting and maybe starting a few fires! Bender, we’re trying our best. If rubbin’ frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don’t wanna be right. Bender, quit destroying the universe! Oh dear! She’s stuck in an infinite loop, and he’s an idiot! Well, that’s love for you. Anyhoo, […]

We don’t have a brig.

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Hey, you add a one and two zeros to that or we walk! It’s a T. It goes “tuh”. Negative, bossy meat creature! And then the battle’s not so bad? And why did ‘I’ have to take a cab? Ummm…to eBay? Of all the friends I’ve had… you’re the first. Oh Leela! You’re the only person I could […]

Belligerent and numerous.

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Ugh, it’s filthy! Why not create a National Endowment for Strip Clubs while we’re at it? THE BIG BRAIN AM WINNING AGAIN! I AM THE GREETEST! NOW I AM LEAVING EARTH, FOR NO RAISEN! You’re going back for the Countess, aren’t you? Oh no! The professor will hit me! But if Zoidberg ‘fixes’ it… then […]

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